Bill and Arnie Call a Spade a Spade
Herbert Kuhner
Bill looked me and a few other people square in the eye, squinting his eyes,
and said: “I want you to listen to me - I’m going to say this again -
I did not have sexual relations with that woman Miss Lewinsky.”
I believed him then and I still do. This is America!
Guys and gals, in this country, sex consists of raising the flag
and hitting the mark where it should be hit. No shilly-shallying around!
The mark is the mark. And hitting it is hitting it.
In America the mouth doesn’t count as a doppelganger,
nor does a cigar!
Here’s Bill again under oath: “When I was alone with Ms. Lewinsky
on certain occasions in early 1996 and once in early 1997,
I engaged in conduct that was wrong.
These encounters did not consist of sexual intercourse.
They did not constitute sexual relations as I understood that term
to be defined at my January 17th, 1998 deposition.
But they did involve inappropriate intimate contact.” (1)
Arnie the muscle-bound Lothario
came to this country as an Austrian.
Austrians are okay, but they aren’t the real McCoy.
Just as Clark Kent becomes Superman,
Arnie transformed himself
into a genuine American.
Arnie knows what’s what.
Arnie provides an “American” definition of extramarital proceedings:
When a friend caught in a compromising situation on a movie set,
Arnie implored, “We won’t tell Maria about it, since it’s only a blowjob
and not real infidelity.” (2)
And here’s Arnie is with a prudent statement:
“The impeachment proceedings and the Lewinsky scandal
was another thing I will never forgive the Republican Party for….
We spent one year wasting time because there was a human failure.
I was ashamed to call myself a Republican during that period.” (3)
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1) Videotaped Testimony of William Jefferson Clinton, President of the United States before the Grand Jury Empanelled for Independent Counsel Kenneth Starr, August 17, 1998; released September 21, 1998.
2) H. Bauernebel, News, Vienna, No. 23, June 2005, p. 182.
3) Arnold Schwarzenegger, George Magazine, Nov. 1999.
