Eager for Matrimony
Herbert Kuhner
These days, when marriage is no longer a social necessity,
some men and lots of women don’t want to tie the knot,
Not only are marriages failing,
but many of those who leave the venerable state -
above all the divorcées -
seem to be hell-bent on bringing down their former mates,
even if the price is financial ruin.
Who can deny that there are advantages
to staying outside of the domestic setup? -
especially for a woman.
More and more women seem prefer women to men.
That seems to make sense.
Aren’t women indeed infinitely more tender
and considerate as partners than men?
There’s none of that wham-bam stuff.
Wedlock may have lost its appeal for many,
yet there are still some who favor it.
Priests and nuns want to hear
wedding bells ringing for them.
And those who had an aversion to tying the knot
are now making a bee-line for the altar.
For profligates and roués matrimony can be
a good cover for shenanigans.
Who would suspect a hubby, who fills and empty suit,
of engaging in hanky-panky?
And ditto for the gay faction.
A gay who wants to stay in the closet
can make a good try with a wife and kids.
But multitudes of gays find the closet confining.
They want celebrate their gay-dom
with all the trimmings.
In the old days, gays could do what they do
without the specter of pregnancy hovering over them
and they considered themselves free
from the scourge of matrimony.
Now gays want to tie the knot to gays,
and the “trimmings” include a family
by either artificial insemination or adoption.
Not a few of the respectable crowd, to their chagrin,
have been pushed roughly out of the closet.
Excuse me for being partisan!
The liberal faction is all for gays hitching up.
And as far as profligates are concerned,
they assert that what consenting adults do
is their own business.
Liberals, however, are a boring batch.
There are seldom fireworks in their quarters.
Most of the fireworks seem to be exploding
in conservative quarters.
Again and again, another respectable citizen is ejected
from the comfy confines of his cozy closet
to be exposed as what he has been bashing.
Yes, not all staid conservatives and evangelicals
are leading Simon-pure lives.
More than a few seem to be
clandestine and surreptitious libertines.
(Actually, the divorce rates in Conservative Red states
are higher than in Liberal Blue states.
The rate in Massachusetts,
a state that permits gay marriage,
is the lowest in the nation.)
You explain it to me!
I’m just relating it.
I don’t have a handle on it.
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